Day Ten: A Sweet Sixteen Birthday In My Backyard?


Ramblings of  a sixteen year old on her  birthday!

Today is my sixteenth birthday, and I know something good is going to happen, after all I’m sixteen now!!!  There is definitely a hush over the entire household because no one is saying a word.

I’m starting to get excited, could Mom be planning a party for me?   If she is, and doesn’t tell me, I could be caught totally off guard!   And yet, a surprise party would be fun….are there really any surprises…of course she’s would be planning a party for me…I’m  Sixteen Today!

Don’t they know I’m old enough to know what’s going on… better get ready, well you know…anything could happen…after all I’m sixteen now….

Late morning …

It’s been  really stressful so far,  just hanging around, listening to some of my favorite records. Mother is starting to clean up the patio, and set the table for four people.  Strange, why only four?  …  I think I need to do my hair, and get dressed…I need to look my best!

 I am at my dressing table making myself gorgeous…just in case

When I pranced out of my room dressed, with my hair done to perfection…….the patio had been decorated with pink, and white crate paper all around the gables, and down the pillars.  The table was set with all pink and white flowers, with Mom’s best china, and paper cups.  Paper cups…what’s with that?  Aren’t I worth putting the crystal out for?  How could she treat me like this?  Another time she just clearly doesn’t care about me!

Soon…three of my best friends are at the front door. Check it out…there is Charlene, Sandy, and Bonny..but they aren’t dressed up.   They should have dressed as if this were the special occasion that it is!  After all this is my birthday party.. and I am sixteen now!  Also, the presents weren’t very big…what’s with that?  Aren’t I good enough for bigger presents?


I feeling kind of , well…..sick!  My stomach is starting to churn, and I feel dizzy.  This isn’t good!  Not good at all!!!  I’m trying not to show how I feel, but I think I’m getting pale, might just really… throw up!  CRAP…CRAP CRAP CRAP!  What did I do to deserve this?  The girls are changing into their bathing suits, and I’m stuck here on the patio.  I don’t dare move around or I will hurl.

My friends are splashing around, swimming, laughing, and playing tag in our pool without me, and I’m stuck here, on the patio, on the chaise….sick…ready to splat Cheerios and milk all over everything!

Mother is starting to  put food on the table, it looks so yummy.  How fair is this?  The chips and dip are already out – which I love, but now..finger sandwiches, potato salad, and Petit fours….OhMyGod!   I love potato salad…. I love chips and dip too, actually I love food!  All food, any food you can think of, I love it all.  Except maybe lima beans, I don’t love lima beans.  I really hate lima beans!  Mother always tries to serve lima bean casserole during lent, and I always gag.  Once I told her they tasted like SHIT,  wow that went over well!  I really thought I would lose my life over that comment, but I’m still here!  After all I was being honest, and they always told me honesty is the best policy!  I guess…not when it comes to lima beans though.  Anyway, I’m now realizing that even though all this food looks really good, if I take even one bite, I’ll lose it!

The party went on without me because I was so excited I had made myself sick.  I never sat at the table, I don’t even remember opening my presents although I know I must have.  The food never hit my mouth, and my entire party was horrible.  I spent the whole day on the chaise lounge watching everyone else have fun, while I gaged down vomit.  After everyone left, the table was cleared, the decorations disappeared, and everyone went about their normal routine….. miraculously….. I recovered.

And that my friends, is the story of my perfectly wonderful, devastatingly horrible Sweet Sixteen Birthday Party!


PS:  As I sat to do research looking for the tunes of the late fifties that all of us listened to, at least where I lived in the suburbs of Los Angeles, they brought a smile to my face just remembering those early days.  I use to tell everyone I was an original Valley Girl until I realized that made me older than dirt!  So now, I’m just a Valley Girl, and that made me somewhat as old as dirt!   Don’t you just love YouTube, there isn’t  anything, you can’t find on YouTube, and I thank them for all the wonderful stuff.   I hope you enjoy.

3 responses »

  1. I love this piece! It made me literally laugh out loud (so sick of lol!) You have such an engaging way of writing. Thank you for posting the songs too. Although born in the 70s, all the songs brought back happy memories of my teenage years too! Shows that music is timeless.


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